Reason #37 Why writing takes so long
#37 Belly Rubs
Anyone who has ever lived with cats understands that belly rubs are a dangerous and often uncharted territory. Cats are not like dogs, make no mistake. When a dog rolls over and shows you a belly, it is clear, your sworn duty as a human being is to pet and pat said belly. Clear and simple. No confusion there.
But when a cat shows you its belly it is an entirely different story. Some cats love to have their belly rubbed, purring happily for the opportunity. And others, well, it’s a trap; a death trap; an invitation to have your face eaten for the transgression. And you had best not confuse the two.
And naturally we have some of each in the house.
Consider the above image. A nice white belly, four feet happily in the air. Now consider this one.
Another nice white belly exposed for all to see. Four piddy paws looking cute and adorable. And the face! Look at that sweet face just begging…
Ah, no.
This, my friends is a trap. And intentional, nefarious trap, set intentionally to lure you into thinking that this cat (which by now you all know is really a tatzelwurm dragon in disguise) wants to have his belly rubbed.
He does not. Not at all, not remotely. Don’t try it. Don’t even think about it. He will know if you are and will act accordingly.
Ask me how I know this. Or don’t. That’s probably a better option. The results weren’t pretty.
So, with all these sweet fluffy bellies about, how is a poor innocent writer to tell which bellies need to be rubbed and which one should be skirted as dangerous to the writing appendages? Quite the conundrum, wouldn’t you say? One that certainly eats into the writing time.
A tatzelwurm dragon in your own home? Beware!!!
Thanks for the fun post!!!
Warmly,
Susanne 🙂
Definitely. One must walk carefully when one lives with a dragon, however small.
I have apparently got a Tazelworm also. Thanks for the tips… relieved to know it’s just not a temperamental cat who wants tuna.
It really does make a world of difference when one knows what she’s living with! 🙂
Phew, thank goodness I have no cats! I have only had a budgie which was part of the household. Bought as a male and called Peter but doubts were raised when ‘he’ laid an egg 🙂
By that time we referred to Peter as he and so continued and he didn’t seem to mind. He liked to help me do jigsaws by pecking out the pieces I had fitted and dropping them off the table. He loved toast, crisps, pizza in fact anything really, he would land on my daughter’s hand while she was eating and reading her magazine, he nibbled the toast then the magazine.
Obviously it didn’t do him any harm as he was 14 when he died.
But back to the Tatzelworm? Well with all the dangers you survive I’m really surprised you manage to write at all.
I’ve always wanted to have a bird as a pet. But I’ve been worried about the cats and dog. I have a very firm belief that family members should not eat one another.
It is very obvious that you have a serious problem on your hands. The suggestive powers of the tatzelwurm dragon is most insidious. They convince unsuspecting prey that they are a simple, harmless house cat in need of a belly rub. When their prey innocently comes in for said belly rub… they attack. Most ingenious and deadly. You are lucky that you are still alive. At least your digits are still intact as they are necessary for alerting the unsuspecting populous, of Blue Order dragon friends and keepers, to the dangers of the tatzelwurm dragon. Yes, lucky indeed.
Indeed, I am. But then again, I think he may have had a little influence on the writing of Jane Austen’s Dragons, so perhaps I get a little mercy because of that. 🙂